Well, as you may have noticed there has been a slight gap between my blog posts lately. Nothing bad has happened (thank goodness) and sadly I can’t blame it on being away on a fancy holiday.
The truth is I fell victim to a serious lack of creativity AKA Writer’s Block (or ‘Blogger’s Block’ I prefer to say).
And ‘Blogger’s Block’ is horrible! I tried writing first thing in the morning, late at night, while at events, even while trying to cook dinner and all I managed to produce were a couple of sentences – boring sentences at that!
As writer’s block is defined as being completely psychological, I had to really think about the reasons why this could have been affecting me. After all, if you don’t understand the problem, how can you find a solution?
My first reason was actually quite obvious. I was fortunate enough to have my first ever blog published in the Huffington Post recently, which raised awareness and encouraged people to give blood as a result of writing about my birth story. After this post went live, I received so many lovely messages from complete strangers who had gone through a similar experience, thanking me as they no longer felt alone. Others just popped me a message to say they gave blood as a result of the article and my friends and family congratulated me on my first piece of published writing.
Don’t get me wrong, I was so happy that I managed to make a little bit of a difference. That was the whole reason behind writing the post. Yet a few days after it had been published, I had a sudden sinking feeling and huge sense of vulnerability. I was now no longer in control of who knew my birth story; anyone who wanted to could read it and I wouldn’t even know. It was as if I had given away a small part of my privacy and now people were now sharing and judging which made me feel open and slightly paranoid. I would think to myself at toddler classes if any of the other mums had read it and if they were secretly judging and thinking – ‘Why would you do that? Why would you write about something so personal?’
But then a blog is personal isn’t it? It’s an infrequent diary of your thoughts and emotions available for the world (well, those who are interested) to read and judge as they see fit and that is what I had signed up for! My blog posts being out there in the World Wide Web forever!
That feeling did take me a little while to get used to but I have been determined to pursue things and not feel embarrassed about what I write. I don’t really have a creative bone in my body but I know I can write a half decent piece when I want to; plus if my writing can help just one person out there, that suits me just fine.
Then popped up reason number 2 of the ‘Blogger’s Block’- what could I write next? My last post had been published in one of the most popular online magazines in the world and there was no way I was going to match that. The pressure just kept building and building until I decided ‘stop trying, an idea will come’. So I waited and waited and waited but no blogging ideas miraculously came into my mind which led to reason 3…
…Complete lack of sleep! Sadly waiting for inspiration to come just led to me staying up later and later doing other things – scheduling social media posts, doing the tax return, whilst still writing boring half-hearted blogging sentences! One night I had a complete time management meltdown and stayed up the whole night! I was still downstairs when my husband got up to go to work at 4am! This stupid mistake ultimately led to severe sleep deprivation and a very low immune system susceptible to attracting every toddler bug going. Of course as we all know you can’t be a mum and be ill! So I think it took me about 3 weeks to fully recover. I even had to cancel an event I was attending as a result of it. I was a silly, silly girl. I won’t be doing that again!
All I can say is thank god for Mother’s Day and a bank holiday weekend because with some lie ins under my belt – I managed to snap back into my old self again! I also received my first International order this week which gave me back the drive I needed!
Then it dawned on me. Why not write about ‘Bloggers Block’? I’m sure other bloggers out there have had the same problem and have wanted some saving grace? Sadly I’m not a miracle worker but for me I learnt that while waiting for that light bulb moment, you cannot sacrifice sleep. You certainly cannot have it all if you don’t doze off into the land of nod every night. It sounds obvious but it is so important to manage your time in order to fit sleep in. Sleep will be your saviour!
I do still consider myself a night owl and rarely go to sleep before midnight. (I’ve posted this just after 12am) But burning the candle at both ends too often can lead to serious problems if you’re not careful. I’m just pleased mine were only toddler bugs and not being able to put pen to paper (or finger to keyboard).
So there you have it – the reasons for my absence but I’m currently cooking another idea to write about, so fingers crossed I don’t let it go that long again!
I’m off to bed!
Until next time!
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